Thursday, December 17, 2009

tO iReNe WiNsToN

THIS IS A TRIBUTE TO A FRIEND WHO

* DOESN'T MIND ME NEVER REMEMBERING HER EXACT BIRTH DATE
* COULD, CAN AND WILL ALWAYS STAND MY RAMBLING BLABLABLA...
* KNOWS WHO'S MY HUGE PRETEEN CRUSH
* KEEPS MY DARKEST (ok maybe not so dark) SECRET
* CAN MERAJUK AND GET ME TO PUJUK
* AT THE SAME TIME I SHOULD'VE CALLED AUNTY tho
* SHARE THE SAME DRY HUMOR WITH ME
* UNDERSTAND MY LINGO
* CAN FORGIVE MY SHARP JABBING TONGUE and...
*LOVE ME (at least that's what she told me) TO EVERY BITS


HAPPY BIRTHDAY IRENE WINSTON!!!


love you baby! have a superb 26!

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Lawak Dewasa


Selama aku dah dewasa, aku makin kerap dapat e-mail2 lucah macam nih, serius lucah, but funny tho. Enjoiceh...


I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

I do physical labor.
I work at great depths.
I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
I work in a damp environment.
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
I work in high temperatures.My work exposes me to contagious diseases.

Sincerely,
P. Niss


The Response


Dear Penis:After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

You do not work 8 hours straight.
You fall asleep after brief work periods.
You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the Correct protective clothing.
You will retire well before you are 65.
You are unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task..
And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.


Sincerely,
V. Gina



Monday, December 14, 2009

orang lain pulang at 2 a.m sebab baru abis clubbing,
aku akan pulang rumah nanti, kick off my shoes tired as hell sebab baru abis keja,
rajinnya...

baby JOY dah tido...mr VAI mata kuyu...how shitty your sunday can be?

Saturday, December 12, 2009

mArI mEmbAcA

baru abis baca blog Che Det'...sakit kepala weng-weng jadi negarawan rupanya owh...aku jadi rumahwan, shoppingcomplexwan, officewan sahaja lah...

kasihan, mentaliti orang kita rupanya tidak ke mana-mana.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

tsk...



So he f*ck your ass...with love?


What the Foot!



Saturday, December 5, 2009

Mind Your Own Bikini

Hulloh...



It's been long since I seriously pour my million penny thoughts here... Been busy ranting and raging in my new found fondness[...ranting again] Well live your life like its no one else's business. Live it at your own pace and never mind what the buzzing langau's got to say about your ass.



My surroundings have this annoying habit we Malaysian call 'jaga tepi kain[tapeh] orang]. I'm no angel OK but I'm not bad in any sense towards any human being[unless you're a real scumbag worthy to troll]. I mind my own stuff, keep my medling to the min, I keep myself updated with the gossip but never am willing to air people's schmelly laundry. So I hate people asking me about my personal life, my 'when/how/why'. Seriously I think busybodies have no life.


I have a friend whose life was close to ruined as a result of malacious gossiping. Kandra, her poor faithfull husband Rick was branded a playboy just because he is good looking and unfortunately working in marketing line. Her confidence towards her husband eroded day by day when there's a 'kepoh' lady friend Moira, broadcasting her story[highlighted, mind you] of "seen with", "heard about" and etc... Luckily somebody was rational enough to help her do some investigation on the allegations and found out......

Moira had a hot for Rick and was spreading rumours so that Kendra would let him go and have him for herself, nice...



AND!!! There was a boss who was cheeky enough to ask about our work progress when her own team had not even started doing anything!



Plus something I overheard at a hotel cafe' sometime ago, some makcik behind me;


A : You know, I heard Alia, my husband's former secretary is *pregnant*... no husband some more, tsk, what a shame!
B : Eh, yakah? So pretty yet so bodoh heh? But she so nice oh? Who told you?
A : C la who else. Now Alia work at her husband's construction firm. Biasa la. Cover only mah... Eh where is C ha, so late as usual!


...after a while, a BIG FAT YELLOW lady arrived...

C : Hey A, you know what I just heard? Now I know who the father to her baby! Eh sorry la lambat.
A : It's ok, who lah?
C : Orang Kaya X, ala...the one who got a Car Retail business ba...
A : Oi C you dont play2, my laki is Haji X also...same business,...
B : *ayak* C! I think A pengsan lah!



lol! I was supposed to pity aunty A but the scene was rather comedic. Padan muka, all I have to say;


MIND YOUR OWN BIKINI LAH!

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

mAnImAtOr^bwah^

Pening kepala aku...
Asal hujung tahun mesti;
*road tax + insurans keta mati
~pas keselamatan mati
#majikan susah mok bayar OT
&*@#!!!!
^kena saman so road tax+insurans+saman=$$$$$$$
*&^%!!!!
~ada Krismas yang perlu dirai=$$$ lagi...
[hutang bank+JPJ+Polis+insurans+security(boo...)=$$$$$$$$$$$$]
Kenapa mesti hujung tahun semuanya???
if I have to walk to work^humph^