WHEN HE'S WITH SOMEONE ELSE

Hi...

Mek sikda madah kan, mek stress dua tiga menjak tok. Mek serba salah tok mok share ka sik, tapi ngenang dirik takut terke-gila-an, tulis jak lah luahan perasaan. Takorang tumpang maca jak k, sikboh prejudis. Macam-macam jadi, mek duak laki bini mala jak sorang ke hulu sorang ke hilir. Orang nanga OK jak, tang happy jak. Hakikatnya pulang umah, mek duak dah jarang klaka sama-sama, minum melo peng sama-sama. Nya mun dapat rah laptop jak, mek kedirik la kuang-kuit ngemas umah, melayan anak.

Mun antar mek pegi kerja, sikda masa nya mok breakfast sama-sama. Mok cepat jak nya. Lunch sikboh jak. Tapi hakikatnya, sms kamek pun dah jarang-jarang. Bingong mek.

Namun pia, mek sik medo k. Yalah resam orang tengah stress berebut tender, gago research k molah proposal, jumpa ngan orang-orang berkenaan. Yalah keadaannya sampai masa bidding project ya selesai. Alahai...

Harapan mek sidak team nya dapat tender ya, agar berbaloi sakit ati mek klakar kedirik sik berjawab, berbaloi anak mek main kedirik merempit atas basikal sik gerak-gerak gago bapaknya meeting online sikda k nulak nya gik, berbaloi masa berharga yang selalu mek sekeluarga spend sesama. Sik sabar nunggu nya free, paling best mun nya kaya raya - sak sikboh kerja gik, hahaha.

OK bah, bersesah lok. Chiao bebehs.

AJARAN SONGSANG

Hm... Kalau dah pemalas memang pemalaslah. Ko madah jak mok explore hobi baru lah, bizi kedirik lah, masa sunyik baruk gago mok nge-on blog nak? Mun ndak baca ajak lah...

Hi.... Lamak sik nanga kitak, sapa jak maca belog angit tok. Lamak mek meranto ke alam khayalan mek tek nak, lamak sik ngabas belog. Lalang dah sama tinggi urang. Pa polah kinek? Wah... Nampaknya datang mood nge-tag tek nak? Semua belog urang berias gown kach2 anggun2 gitew, meleleh nafsu. Ok la kitak urang rajin koh... Mek malas na wak.

Tapi kan... Lamak sik ngapdet hal anak2 ngan laki bini, mok juak nulis kan? Kedong sikda papa mok di share. Adalah hari ya, si Darrien tek nanyak bapaknya,

'Daddy what we call the place we play benminten?'

Jawablah tek panjang lebar berexample segala bapaknya, madah ya badminton court, tennis main rah tennis court, basketball tek di basketball court. Sampeylah sigek soalan trick nya tek... Bapaknya tanyak, football play where lah? Ingat tek nya jawab football court, kan patutnya football field tek? Paduhal, nah spoiler...

'AFRIKA'

sik leput kau? Parai kita asal mok main bola ngagak Afrika.

Baby Joy dah besar ko... Dah dara, pi skalor juak la kerenahnya. Sik lamak dolok tek nak, neneknya ngajar... Mun tertumpah barang pegi amik kain kakya lap, pandey dah nya. Tapi kinek tok, datang idea nya, mun tumpah barang makan, tapok dibah pinggan, hah - kau ada? Ariya nya nenen pagi la tek, abis nenen tinggal sikit jak rah burit botol diengkah nya di hujung palak tilam, kakya gugok... Tertumpah la sikit nenen nya. Ditegur mek, 'Tumpah nenen ya, how now?'. Ingat tek mok berekot keluar pegi sinki amik kain k ngelap, paduhal ditolak nya bantal ke sia nutup area nenen tumpah. 'Na...no more'. Adeh...

Bah... Lain kali gik, apa tek, mek ngait beg dah kinek tok, dah siap lak mek upload k. Mok order boleh juak, tapi mahal la, mwahahahaha.....

SET THE TABLE, GET THE BALL ROLLING

Hi...

It's been tiring the whole week, we had thanksgiving prayer for my bro in-law who recently got promoted and transferred to Labuan Shell starting tomorrow! Man....I did deep-frying the whole day I even fried my thumb! Anyway back to the topic, what is it all about? Friend of mine sort of hit the rock with his wife over what I think is inane issue. So this post goes out to you D. Ladies and gentlemen can all benefit from this.

Well, most of us married couples don't talk much about issues because issues lead to argument and that is ugly. Be it money, time management, kids, hygiene or anything many couples simply avoid bringing up issues that can provoke disagreement. However by doing so, you are actually doing something called 'bottle-necking' and the burst is going to be messy.

I argue a lot with MrVai. I love him so much but still I hit on that red button every time I feel that he needs some correction and so does he. I never allow myself to go to sleep with unsolved issues. God gave you mouth and that voice so that you can speak for yourself. Women always act their way through and men hate that. Be realistic he can't read your mind! Just be careful on how are you going to bring it up.

Myself I prefer starting while I'm washing the dishes. Just an example for you because I think during that time I'll have my attention or anger channeled to the water, bubbles and plates. I'd be less critical and try not to be cynical. Cynical is what most men despise. It doesn't help solving anything but it fans on the anger. Focus on what wrong he did, not him as a person so be wise to say "I don't think gambling is good for our household economy" instead of "You gamble wayyyy to much we're close to broke". Address the issue spot-on as possible so avoid beating around the bush.

Once he gives you that attention, calm down and bring it to the table. Give him your points clearly and orderly so he can follow what you say. Tell him why you think he needs to change his certain way and how it affects you and your relationship with him. When you're done, let him talk and share his opinion. He might not agree completely with you but be kind to tolerate too. No man change overnight. Talk more on how to adjust and rearrange everything. While doing so don't be hesitant to apologise even if it's not your fault. It works and will gain you respect, I know because I do that.

So don't be afraid to voice out your thoughts, doubts, concern or fear. Bring it up - and find a solution. Be rational and argue in a civilised manner, I don't want some flying saucers over my head. It's OK to be angry but there's always a way for everyone to be happy winning and losing at the same time.

Till then, bye.....muah!!!

ANAK AKU DAH TAU *&%@#$#$%$%^^

ye sedara dan sedari anak aku dah pandai mengarut.. as a mom aku rasa nak spank anak aku tapi she's so adorable so sabar je lah bukan dia faham pun. and I have to accept bad words comes first, well at least she's making sentences. OK dah tengah malam aku ringkaskan cerita.

Situasi 1 ;
me - Joy come pasang pampers
Joy - ngai, ngegeh, piiirah! [blame MrVai, he tought her]

#ngai = don't want
ngegeh = terhegeh-hegeh, mengada-ngada, kenja kata kita nak?

Situasi 2 ;
me - time for nap, come.
Joy - piyo?
me - go find your piyo.
Joy - weyuput? [where you put?]

Situasi 3 ;
me - mommy go work ok Joy stay home, don't be naughty k sayang.
Joy - Jojoy fowo?

Situasi 4 ;
she'd been napping, wake up, and look for me.
- where mommy? mami ja [kerja]...
hearing that I feel so kasihan.



SO kepada yang single, enjoy la rehat puas2, melancong, dah ada anak they're very demanding. you barely have time for yourself. GOODNIGHT fellas. Love ya'll.

KAMUS ANAK-ANAK

ermmm...nothing much, busy mothering, busy working and mostly back to reading. But now as of right now I'm indulging YouTube.

OK see there? Right next to the lattest post is Kamus Anak-Anak. Since I can't really put my fingers on their daily diary, I keep up with the kids lingo. It's fun trying to get what they say and frustrating when they are jumping and crying but you can't seem to understand. My most recent headscratching time was yesterday. Mr Vai was nice doing us lunch and one of the dish is stalky and leafy choy sum fried with egg, then little Joy suddenly shouted ' I wan jujuk!!!'. I tried to ask her what jujuk is but she kept on saying jujuk again and again while pointing towards the dining table. Mr Vai came to rescue when he simply lift her up and make her point to the exact jujuk. Apparently to her, jujuk means the juicy stalk part or if it is today's case it also applies to long beans. There you go problem solved, all the way being mother I couldn't have missed that skill. So now I'm keeping roll on her daily new words and for you guys to read too.

have a nice day, and enjoy it!

HIDUP SEMINGGU RASA SEMINIT

hm...hari-hari sibuk tapi jiwa tak tenang. Blog kosong bersawang macam rumah hantu. Anyway updates running in...

LAST 16th was Darrien's birthday tapi party was 19th. Kaya raya budak tu, dapat RM130 angpau. Mak dia ingat aku pregnant lagi, she saw our FB party pic, saw my perut lalu konklusi aku pregnant. I lol-ed hard. Baju aku hari tu memang buat aku nampak pregnant, well whatever.

22nd---MrVai offer nak sponsor beli handphone baru, wah...murah hati ye? Aku nak phone flip, tapi dia tak kasi because babyJoy tu ganas, patah phone baru tau so OK pass. Dia offer the berry-berry thing or touch-touch thing tapi I pick the cheap 'cybershot sony' with 3.2mpix cam. Why oh Why aku taknak berry stuff? Susah nak guna that is, aku jenis orang call and sms je so the rest tak penting sangat pun. And the touchpad thing? Aku tak yakin ia dapat survive sebulan pun before kena scratch here and there. Alahai kadang tu dengki jugak tengok kawan-kawan beryy-ing, tapi kalau tak praktikal untuk aku takpelah..

AND AKU TAKDE IDEA. TIBA-TIBA MENTOL DALAM TENGKORAK AKU PADAM, JADI HITAM. IDEA TADI ENTAH KE MANA DAH. TAPI SEMINGGU NI SANGAT CEPAT BERLALU, DARI RABU LEPAS KE HARI INI, MACAM SEMINIT JE JARAKNYA.





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RINDUNYA!!!

stretch!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hiya! I miss you all!

hai...hai...hai!!!! anyway come join me buat page BAN KAK SOPIA FROM CALLING ALL RADIO STATION.

oh sudah lama ya saya tidak kemari...template baru gik ya, haha... ohai you guys! how are you all? ada sihat? mak sihat... kenapa ya lama tidak muncul? jeng-jeng-jeng!!!!

Masa pulang dari Kuching hari tu, almari nampak semak, yang baju berlipat jadi bergantung, adakah....YA!!! My dream became reality! Mr Vai memang menanti di rumah, mencuci kereta, beri memew makan dan menyiram bunga. The project ended early so contract pun habis awal. Oh if you wonder - he went diving this time, piloting ROV entah bila lagi. Itu menjawab speku si Ahmoi apa yang digali MrVai di laut sana. Dia tidak menggali utai, dia memantain utai, hehe. Hahaha... that kind of explain my silence, enjoying every minute with the beloved beloved. But now its World Cup or ballcup kata si Darien, I have some reason to spend some precious hours on my taman hati.

BabyJoy tengah tak sihat, busy jugak lah nursing anak lincah walaupun tengah sakit. This morning bangun tido mata melekat pula, kesian... Darien pun flu jugak, kalau tidur malam macam cute la pulak dua beradik tu berpegangan tangan and sleep with the same posture. Malam tadi tidur sebantal, awww... Yesterday Darien innocently suggest - esok we go stadium see ballcup k? Oh-Oh-Oh apa dia ingat nak pegi South Africa tu naik bas Kuala Baram saja kot.. So my precious friends, I'll be around reading and commenting now, cuma maybe agak busy to write a new and meaningful entry. With 3 monsters to mind it's a bit difficult to find time for myself even, sigh.


Have a nice day, you like my new template? Rasa fresh macam lepas mandi lah.

GAWAI HOLIDAY

Penatnya.........................................................alasan saya bercuti musim Hari Gawai ini.


Nowadays cuti Gawai cuma alasan mahu bercuti dan berkumpul dengan keluarga jauh dan dekat. Petani-petani sawah kini cuma banyak di Farmville dan Farmtown jadi boleh lah diambil alasan ini untuk mengekalkan perayaan hari Gawai dalam kalender. My blog will be stagnant macam air parit tercemar tak bergerak selama seminggu. Be back from holiday on the 8th. I'm looking forward to see my parents, family and friends. I guess a visit to my late mother and brother's grave is essential too.

Harap-harap masa pulang nanti Mr Vai ada di rumah, tengah siram bunga, berik memew makan, cuci kereta. Harap-harap masa tu ada scene video clip slow-mo showing me running towards his embrace. OK - tipu. Teruskan berangan.

Pulang Kuching by road, naik RUSH - hopefully selesa. So see you guys when I'm back from holiday. For the time being, I mintak maaf kalau I pernah langgar blog yuolls, basahkan lantai rumah dan sebagainya. Enjoy Holiday!

MOTHER'S DAY

Mulakan harimu dengan sengihan - sungguh tak ikhlas. Ok mulakan harimu dengan senyuman.

Another day another story but today is a different story because it is not like every other day it is MUMMIES DAY - imagine zombified moms. I'm not going to sing praise about my mothering skills but I'll spin and tweak it a little to my own daily version. Being a mother to a hyper-vitagen-sugared-peanuts-protein 2 year old daughter and a stepmother (yes, you got it right) to an emo-rebel-potty mouthed 7 year old son is not FUN, it's both tiring and trying. While I'm likely to be the undesired police in the house my kids get along very well with each other, and their dad. There's no half sibling or step sibling in the house. Darrien and Joy are unseparable, put the daddy into the mix they will be ice kacang and leave me to be the straw- get what I mean?

Character breakdown starts with DADDY;
Very able in many ways - excellent cook, sporting clown, the 'yes you can' authority and practically the DON of the house. Our kids adore him, daddy can't be wrong-daddy is great-daddy is so cool-and whatever superb. If the kids have anything they wish to have, it's their daddy who gets the nudge and rants. When they play/which I'm not so good at, they bring down the house to rubble. Means...mommy will tidy up, it's OK, just play. I once go to sleep at 2 a.m. cleaning baby Joy's scribble on our kitchen wall and clear the kitchen after Darrien & Dad played Jamie Oliver. Daddy being nice decided to teman me cleaning and made me hot milo to end-and a good neck massage. His words always being 'you'll miss the moment' really helps me calm down. But still, when the need arises for him to be strict you'll see the kids making beeline behind me. I always smile at that scene.

Big Brother Darrien (he was 3 when we first met and peed on my lap, sleeping)
Potty-mouthed yes, BIG TIME. At 7 years old it is impossible to stop him from discovering foul words especially when this is the boy who travel 3 residences; our's, his mother's and the gramps. He has a lot of cousins and of various age range, a recipe to disastrous lingo. He's very aware of your every words or statement and that leads to an emo kid sitting on the stair if you don't watch what you say. A very certain personality he knows what he wants and if restrained will rebel his way through. His attention span is 5 mins. Give him a new toy he will get over with it the day after. No matter how expensive the toy is, it will still break down. He's with us mostly on weekends only so he gets free pass from being grounded. However he can be very sweet and considerate, taking care of baby Joy when he knows I'm too tired to run around the house after them both and doing chores at the same time. And very good looking too. Here's the lovely part, his mother refused for him to call me anything equaling to mother so he joined his dad calling me 'dear'. *adorable* imagine him calling me that at 17, priceless.

Baby Joy
This is the one baby to whom every nursery will close their door. Very hyperactive and super loud. She zips around like energizer bunny, climbing anything like spiderwho, thrash around like we have 3 maids at our disposal. Our own Picasso I think I'll paint our walls BLACK from tiring days cleaning walls and floor. Very cute with her naturally golong @ curly hair but I'd advise you not to be fooled by that, she bites and screams like screeching tires. I think she's auburn, lol. She eats a little but takes everything that comes her way. Chocolate @ chet is always available thanks to her designated Aunty Mamam. Her daddy introduced Coke to her months before her first birthday, with that amount of sugar...HYPER. Joy's vocabulary for now are very limited and somehow I found myself understanding among others

mam - eat / ding - drink / chet - chocolate / brrr - coke / kakut ya - takut ya
kakit - sakit / hee hoo - bathtime / smeyee - smelly / o'oi - sleep

~17 months with her aunty Mamam~

*relevan lah tu, the kotak was Happy Meal Box*

Combine the 3 'monsters' we have a real life moniker of 'How To Train A Dragon' . I'm the trainer with 3 dragons. Their antics are impossible, their mess unbearable, the noise numbing but take one away and I'll be miserable. Like Mr Vai said, our life might be 'tonggang langgang' but we do have a wonderful one. Mothering may not be fun, but seeing the kids growing up great and at the right path is rewarding. I only hope I have enough patience and resource to face their teenage years. That I think will be more challenging, right now it's all naughty and cute. So far, I think I did just fine. Although everytime I end my day looking like mummy I surely did enjoy my day being mommy to my kids. There...

Adorable kids+Cool Dad+Miserable Mom= Happy Family


HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY EVERYBODY
make it everyday

p.s: bah, apa lagi. yang single2 ya bila gik? on a side note, my birth mother died before I was 3, so my stepmom cared for me just about the same age I took Darrien. the similarity, I feel her.

BABY JOY AND DADDY *update*

~Sedihnya rasa hati, Baby Joy birthday 17 Mei nanti, she'll turn 2 and guess what? Her beloved daddy won't be there blowing candles with her like yesteryear~

Perangai makin naughty, kobek-kobek and throwing tantrum and what nots I just can't seem to handle. Nak aku spank-kan nanti masa nangis dia psycho aku balik, calling her 'daddy', when she knows he isn't there. Tak ke sebak aku, rasa bersalah lagi ada. These two 'monsters' are so close I can't get my way with any one. If I 'pap' the daddy the baby will 'pap' me. If I scold the baby the daddy will animatedly 'pap' me to cheer baby up.

Now that the daddy is away I'm left with this guilty feeling whenever I have to discipline her 'a bit'. And I know Mr Vai misses Baby Joy more than he misses me. But when she's sleeping she looks so angelic and all my day's problem seems so distant. All the wonders of being a temporary single mum.

~ 6 months and napping with daddy~

*note the same sleeping posture*

~dear...I miss you!

CINTA ANUGERAH TERINDAH

Kasihan paduhal Ahmoi sakit, mun ndak sik ku gago menggagah dirik speku nya ada sesi dating-mating ngan Mr bin Abdullah. Hehe...bukan aku sorang nak? Kawan-kawan lain pun asa ku speku juak. Rupa-rupanya sakit ngembak ngail. Semoga cepat sembuh k? Olalala...kesian...

Maka dengan itu kubukak cerita bahawa aku sakit juak. Sik la sakit teruk sampey sik larat oh, choi!!! Sik sihat ala-ala manja jak gitu, atchium-atchium jak. Last Sunday bangun tido alu start berkasik, geruk asa skres, maka start la asa mah nyawa, sikda selera makan kak ya sik bertenaga. Tapi ya bukan la isi kandungan buku teks k? Tajuk sebenar hari ini ialah kaitan kasih-sayang dengan kesihatan.

Y'all tauk kan, laki ku sikda di sisi kinek, paling menyesakkan recent update madah nya tambah period kerja to 120-150 days approx. Alu semput dada I.

Ok, back to our topic, berdasarkan kajian, orang yang berpasangan lebih sihat berbanding orang single. Maksudnya, paras hormon happy a.k.a endorfin dalam badan kita sentiasa terhasil akibat ransangan rasa bahagia dari daily gestures like hugging, touching, etc...yang aku malu mok tulis sini. Kajian sentiasa membuktikan individu yang gembira adalah lebih terhindar dari jangkitan bakteria atau virus-virus yang merbahaya, ke berbahaya, ada cikgu BM sik mok correct aku?
Kajian Kes : Mr Vai jauh, sikda orang sayang me everyday, sikda orang make proper breakfast sebelum turun kerja sebab bininya gago conteng muka, sikda orang berik hug lamak-lamak just to say it's OK when problems come up. Sebab yalah aku kenak selesema, sore throat and might be cold fever hanya setelah Mr Vai e-mailed me about his extended working days.


Passionate kisses are good for your oral health!It’s not all doom and gloom. Research into passionate kissing has uncovered many valuable health benefits. Healthier mouth, saliva contains substances that fight bacteria, viruses and fungi. Deep kissing increases the flow of saliva, which helps to keep the mouth, teeth and gums healthy.
Kajian Kes : Sikkan aku mok cium tokey mi kolok ya... isk...


Love is always good for your heart. When with your loved ones your blood pressure goes down, allowing better reasoning and keeping anger at bay. Good blood pressure means good heart condition.
Kajian Kes : Bila sang Arjuna jauh di mata, jiwa mala jak datang moha. Asa emosi lalu mok ngansa' jak nyawa. Hilang pen pun emosi, sungguh tidak munasabah. Selalu macam tok boleh sakit jantung seh.

Love makes you put more regard on your health status. You will want to be around longer so you put effort in securing good health.
Kajian Kes : Kenak aku peratikan, laki aku ya makin Tall, Dark and Gendut jak oh... Ok at least rasa sayang antara kami 2 dah memotivasikan nya eksesais, start jogging yang lamak sik diamal, makan oat untuk kurangkan kolestrol dan berusaha berhenti merokok.


Love makes you look good. Actually, cinta tok molah kita 'feel' good. Secara tak langsung akan membuatkan kita glow. Seri kata orang, cuba nanga muka bakal pengantin, kacak sik?
Kajian Kes : Sikboh molah kajian, I nang sentiasa Hot Gojes and Fabeles. hehe...hik-hik..


Bagaimana Untuk Memupuk Kasih Sayang
SENTIASA BERKOMUNIKASI
-walau jauh travelling, kita ada sms, video call, e-mail, so apa cara sekalipun sentiasa lah cari jalan untuk berkomunikasi. Kalau berdekatan eloklah diamalkan meluangkan masa bercakap berdua hati ke hati. Quality time kata orang.

SENTIASA COMPLIMENT EACH OTHER
-jangan kedekut pujian, kalau masa bergerek selalu memuji, dah kawen tu teruskan lah... Apa salahnya puji, 'nyaman laksa tok yang...kalah laksa di kedey' ndak ka kembang dada bini mendengarnya?

CIPTA HOBI TERSENDIRI
-unik untuk anda berdua, suka pangku-memangku kah, cari kutu laki kah, cat kuku bini kah, manicure/pedicure laki kah, something intimate, untuk men'sweet'kan perhubungan.

TERIMA KEKURANGAN PASANGAN
-jangan kelebihan ajak. sayangi pasangan kita sepenuhnya.

CIPTA HUBUNGAN HARMONI DENGAN KELUARGA SIDIA
-percayalah, semua yang sudah berkahwin akan mengakui hakikat tok. keluarga pasangan kita menyumbang kepada keharmonian hubungan kita laki-bini.


Sekian tips-tips untuk hari ini, nyawa agik malas tok mok menghurai, cintai dirimu sayangi cintamu.

BULAN MENUNGGU PUNGGUK_sigh_

Pagi tadi Mr Vai hantar aku turun kerja. Niat asal was to have breakfast together but memandangkan nya dah aher lalu lah lalang sik jadi. Ya now he's gone, away offshore. Away for maybe 50 days or more. Aik mata aku walau ditahan mauk juak bocor kedak paip dalam public toilet. Beg nya udah ku pack; coverall/check-boots/check-boxers/check-allnighter/check. Senangnya packing beg makhluk nama lelaki. Kubekalkan oat and minyak panas, sweet kan? Adoehhh...mun ikut nyawa mauk bekalkan sigek supermarket.

Macam-macam dipesannya, jaga anak bait2. Mun stress iboh suka ngigit anak, sakit ya. Makan tengah hari jangan tinggal, pukul tiga bukan lunch dah. Mun rindu ngan nya sikboh mala jak nanga video file dalam henpon, makin piluk kelak katanya. Ikan masin jangan dimakan selalu, tinggi darah kelak. Sayur makan, iboh susun tepi pinggan. Baju malam tadik cucikan, jangan mok simpan pakey cium tiap malam mbak tido kedak hari ya, tuala juak. Malam tido awal, laki sikda neman kelakar tengah malam kelak hantu datang tetak nanga aku main Facebook pukul 1.30 pagi. Blogging ya jangan mok muji laki dirikmpun ajak2, mual orang baca. Boh manas jak kerja.

Pesan aku ngan nya? Jaga diri sia. I'll miss you, *sob-sob, come back safely okay? *sob-sob

Aok laki ku lebih banyak menjaga dari dijaga. So independent I dont know what to really care about him. Sebab ya bila nya pegi walau ke Bintulu sekalipun aku akan rasa lost and lonely.

Orang cuma tauk kerja offshore tok masyuk...lumayan donk. Aok tapi aku rasa sentiasa bermain dengan bahaya. Mun sampey pegi ke pesisir Iran aku risaukan Al-Qaeda movements who kidnap and torture and kill and what not anything that goes across their path. African seas are infested with kidnapers too, mostly pirates. Where there is blackgold there will also be monster predators. Yang aku belum dengar is platform minyak kenak hijack*choi*. Malangnya tempat jin bertendang ya lah lubuk rejeki orang kedak laki ku.

So the least I could do is pray for his wellbeing and wait for a safe return. And bila nya cuti I'm sure he's just as happy being a home-husband taking care of his house and family.

Pesanan penaja : distance makes the heart grows fonder. true sangat2.

#esok lusa I'll be back. until then, let me schmell his night shirt to my heart's content.

LOVE ME LOVE ME NOT

Dear BDiary

It’s been long since I last wrote down my two cents in here. So far I was caught-up in an emotional turbulance which disable my rational thinking and drown my happy self. Nobody said it’s going to be easy, life is not easy, relationship is not easy, and marriage CERTAINLY is not easy. Forgive me Bdiary, it was hard for me to put down my feelings in words. But now I think the time comes for me to share with you something about myself, my opinion on relationship and how far would you go for it.

I am easy to read, like an open book with illustrations. I am not good at hiding my feelings, so transparent that if I like/love somebody it shows and if I hate certain thing/person it shows even more. My action always betray my conscience, when I wanted to appear angry I’d cry, and it’s not easy to appear icy when all you want is to communicate and clear the air. When all effort to veil my feeling failed, I’d still end up crying. My heart is so fragile my tears are like windscreen shower. When I see an old lady alone at coffee shop I can’t help but think that she’s alone in life then I’d feel sad. I saw and old man at bus stop and can’t help myself thinking his children left him. And now there’s abandoned baby everywhere, my tear went auto pilot. When I’m emotional I find my way into this blog, and let you buggers read my mind. Hmmm…

If there’s anything that my heart refuse to give in easily it will be forgiveness. I don’t forgive easily, I don’t forget easily, maybe not a good quality but it keeps me from hurting myself when betrayal repeats itself. But I don’t revenge, it is not my style. Mr Vai doesn’t appologize with ease, it is always me who embrace humility to make up after each fight. When we fight he tends to space himself from me [I hate being alien to him] in order to avoid further damage from painful words we throw at each other. Truth is always painful so we deny it so often it hurts the other party. The act of humility is noble, at least to me. When you are in a relationship WORTH SAVING, it is important to know when to swallow your ego. A man will always be man, they have an ego size bigger than their brain and penis combined its true. So I always appologize although I know I wasn’t at fault. But then again after I appologize, he’ll usually realize how much I love him that I’m willing to always give in to him. And I get his respect. Most of the time it is up to us women to start an effort in order to save our love, keep the fire burning, keep the passion alive and ultimately keep HIM by ourside. Many of us tried and failed, then it may be because the relationship wasn’t meant to be. If that happens, it is not our fault. Don’t blame yourself when all your effort to save your relationship goes down into the drain, unappreciated. Don’t punnish yourself for being in the failure. But think of it as a loss for him to let go of a precious love you offered.

Note that in any argument, never show it to public or people around you. I made it a must to solve any conflict behind the kids. SMSes, e-mail, in the car are the privacy available for choice. I so far had managed to keep verbal arguments at bay by texting Mr Vai while we’re taking our time away from each other. He may be in the verandah and me in the kitchen but we always manage to solve everything without shouting at each other through SMSes. It is better that way compared to talking when mad during which we tend to slip tongue and said things we don’t really mean. At least through SMSes we get the time space to let words go through our head and let the tiny brain work on better reasoning. And then, when it comes to mending heart wound always start with a touch - on his hand. It doesn’t really matter who started the fight, for all my concern we live a short life to waste time on silly and regretful fights.

However I’m big in my effort to show my affection towards my loved ones. Never was I lack of hugs and kisses, I made it seem normal to hug and kiss Mr Vai in front of his family, and kids too. It is not to show off how loving we are, but I am determined to nurture love in the family unit itself simply by showing a good example. The first time was awkward for sure. Many men find it hard to express themselves, so be strong enough to show how. But when he doesn’t show it, do not despair. Man are like walls, you can lean on it when needed but don’t expect it to embrace you and offer soothing words like a girlfriend do.

I was always afraid of relationship that I never stand a date more than 3 months. My allergy towards men was incureable that I broke much heart along the way before I meet my husband. When I met Mr Vai I however was enchanted. I knew I want to keep him forever, grow old together and I told him so. And here we are braving the fourth year together towards many years ahead. My friends think I sacrifice a lot for him, he thinks I sacrificed everything for him but yet I think there’s nothing to gain but LOVE. I’ve waited long for this relationship to happen and to be honest I am blessed to have my dream realized. He never gave me flower, not a petal, and I never hoped for it. It is a winning game, where I have to forgo common romantic imagination for a better real life deal. But he talks like a baby when he feels like it, lie down on my lap and let me listen to his pain, ease his stress. Honestly I was underloved as a child since my step mother doesn’t show much affection towards me. Mr Vai knew of that and now he showered me with love. He watch my diet, ask me about work although I know he doesn’t understand my rambling, and even occasionally baths me *blush*. When I’m in difficult situation and he have no word of comfort to offer, he simply hugs me, and let me wet him with my tears. He is protective of me and that always bring tear to my eyes. What can I say, I am just blessed and very teary too.

So BDiary, or anybody reading,
When looking for a relationship, find one that completes you as a piece. You are a partner not an arm candy. Find the one who give back. Like me maybe you’ll have to make do with the small attention he gives for an unquestionable love and loyalty he has to offer. You may get a typical unromantic husband like mine, but unromantic doesn’t mean unloving. His affection doesn’t have to be made public, just enough for you to know is fine. Find one who appreciates, and honour you as a gift from GOD. Find one who can protect you from harm. And make sure he can accept you as who you are.

If your heart is hurt, give it some time to heal. Things happen for a reason, and time will tell what reason. The next time you find a true love, you’ll feel complete. But a successful relationship needs effort to nurture so be ready to give in whenever it matters. Never expect perfection or you’ll be disappointed. If he’s a fire then be the water. Man are meant to be superior, they were engineered that way so don’t bruise their ego. But NEVER be a doormat, know when to stand for yourself and leave. And pray…may the divine power help keep the love alive till we die, and set a good example of true love to our generations. I would love to have my future grandchildren grow up to be loving, humble and caring people, and tell their own kids about the love story of their great ancestors. That will be sweet.


Till then,
XOXO

semalam hari apa

marek... my BIRTHDAY!!!

aok, marek birthday aku, ada kek, pezen, peluk cium, macam-macam ada...

and 3 tahun gik aku 30, 30??? adoh... sikhal, lets just enjoy the present. now I'm just 27, so there, entry malas birthday girl, still angau dengan hadiah 'istimewa' MR.VAI marek. hehehe...hihihi...apakah itewww...


oh, esok tahun baru cina, we'll be celebrating it at aunty's place.

'HAVE A SCRUMPTIOUS BIG DINNER FELLAS'

'GONG XI FA CHAI

aKu

adoieh...lamak tok nang bizi la aku, keja ke malam, sampey belakang ku somewhere around area ujung rambut ku tumbuh jururawat[ye...jururerawat act], dahi area hairline ada juak, jururerawat manja, bukan batu, nasib la...

aku mok berehat, sik sabar nunggu abis bulan tok, kak ya rehat. mala jak aku keja ke malam. cobala ada gayo mok ngubat nurse2 manjak tok owh, giney mok makey baju siksi la...bareback aku ya lamak sik makey. gown dibeli Mr Vai di pilipin pun baruk jak skali makey.

mah nyawa ku, bingung jiwaku, angol palak ku. ~waaaa!!!!!!!

jeles jak maca ahmoi chantek madah idupnya tang almost perfecto jak. apa tek, love it to bits? abis skolah all time pakey manjak dirik. aku? huh.

dahla, memew aku[Mr Vai mpun pusak act] kenak dera orang, ada ka patut lower leg nya kenak POTONG sigek/sebelah. kesian ku nanga... napa orang ya gila, mok munuh aku sik kesah jangan seksa nya. tedah SLYVESTER, i pray for your wellbeing.

mah nyawaku, menchik ku, ingga ku...

FOR THE STONE THROW AWAY

~finally~
he's coming back to me
he's coming back home
so close
I'm counting the hours
yet felt so long
it's OK
~sigh~

this song is just right, so right

HUSBANDS FAR AWAY

YOUR WIVES MUST BE MISSING YOU SO MUCH!

Yes hubbies... Your wife misses you. Let me narrate this common story most likely endured by any wife whose husband doesn't really wear tie and doesn't work weekly 8-5. They go far away from home and for a very long time. We'll have it at my own plot... Honestly my side of the story...tsk...tsk...

When He's Around

Waking up early is always difficult when you need to wake up occasionally to feed the ever hungry/thirsty baby. I love it whenever Mr Vai took the trouble to get up early just to prepare my bath, help me wash Bjoy's late-night bottles and of course some yummy breakfast. I'd hug him, my way of saying thank you. He'd knowingly squeeze me back and rush me to shower as he knew I'd waste more time 'minta manja' and ending up late for work. Yeah...

Mr Vai insists on sending me to work, so spare me driving for I've been used to take the passenger seat. I love letting him do the morning talk as I always take some time loading my system. We'll kiss before I get out of the car, study says that couples who kiss before their spouse go to work will unlikely be involved in accident at workplace,hmm... Like duh.. What accident can happen at MY office.

Work is work and my Mr Vai doesn't like sms-ing me unless necessary. So,wait till I finnish my work -dummmm-

Ok,he pick me up after work,and it usualy goes like this;

Mr Vai : Bring your ass out here.

Come evening, he usualy cooks dinner. And he cook GOOD dinner, always experimenting with his cooking he so far never failed to delight my taste buds.

When I'm busy doing the laundry, Mr Vai will always be happy to play with Bjoy. And we'll chat till the wee hour, unless I feel so sleepy to begin with.
And that's the summary of a happy working day with Mr Vai around.

He's Not Around

I have to wake up early but usualy late (so pampered and timing). Skip the breakfast, only kiss Bjoy and go to work.

My father in-law send me to work because Mr Vai refuse to let me drive, for now. I can't kiss my father in-law so I just get out of the car. Of course he also pick me after work. I have to watch my timing. I wait for him and not the other way around.

I eat whatever is there on the table, mom in-law had it ready.

Bring Bjoy to sleep, she keep calling me daddy. -sigh-
And that's a plain working day without Mr Vai around.


...Dear, come back home... I miss you..

WHAT WE WIVES DO WHEN LEFT ALONE

I know..not all of us are lucky enough to have the pleasure of our husband's presence 24/7. Most of us need to manage life on our own while our other half's away working. But I've had that opportunity to have him around almost 24/7 and enjoyed it literally. He's a sweet life partner,maybe because he cooks for me(almost all the time),massage me after a long day,listen to my rambling even with his eyes shut,plus many more acts we ladies call caring,am I not pampered enough?

However recently as my husband switched to a new career,his working mode obviously changed. I'm so not used to being left on my own for more than a week. What's more if it is longer than a month? Easy said,it means my first time to go around paying bills(not that I never do it all,but it's been long),feels awkwardly 'single' again. Wonder how Mirian offshore wives manage their schooling kids and daily tasks alone. And I wonder if husbands far away ever thought about the wonder-woman left at home.

So kudos to all madam independent. You all are the pillar of men's success.